The Awe of Glittering Snow

It snowed all over North Carolina in December this year. Not just flurries and a bit of sugar dusting on the grassy areas, but real, actual snow accumulation. Not the norm in this area of the U.S. This impromptu storm (named Diego ... when did snowstorms start getting names?!) brought about government and school closings, treacherous roadways, and power outages. It also brought about community bonding, random assistance from neighbors and strangers, and the pure joyfulness of children's laughter ringing through the air as they took part in winter activities that normally never have a chance of occurring in the south. Positive light born from what could be viewed as catastrophe.

No matter where you live, there is something completely magical about watching snow fall. Its incredible asymmetry is breathtaking. There's a majestic quiet that's completely inspiring as millions of snowflakes drift to the ground and cover every inch in a chilly, sparkling white cloud. What before was browns and greens, with areas of dirt or litter, instantly becomes a purified vision of beauty. Eventually though, temperatures rise and the glittering snow begins to melt away. Slowly the blades of grass and areas of dirt and concrete begin to show through the purification of white. Eventually, no trace of the pristine gorgeousness remains, save our photos and memories.

Politics and humanity are similar in this phenomenon. A crisis, a catastrophe, a hardcore event occurs and the positive side of humanity is brought out. Communities worldwide bond, strangers assist those in need, and even children rejoice and take part in the positive that is born from the negative. Eventually though, recognition of the issue dies down, neighbors and strangers go back to their own sequestered lives and again turn a blind eye to injustices that occur daily, and the sense of hope and humanity that thrived during the the crisis begins to subside. But does it have to?

Just like those last sugar dustings of snow that refuse to melt away, so should our hopes, senses of empathy, and gifts of giving wholeheartedly to those who need our help. Just because the blinding, adrenaline-laced sparkle of catastrophic need eventually melts away doesn't mean that the requirement is not still there. That litter on the ground, like the needs of humanity, that was hidden by the previous glittering blanket of snow still needs to be cleaned up, to be assisted in becoming the epitome of quiet beauty and peace that only previously existed under a glittering blanket of snowflakes.

Maybe we could all strive to hang on to those charitable, giving ideals year-round. Not just during this, the season of giving, but throughout every season. Just like those final little patches of snow that refuse to melt, we too have the ability to create a glittering world of quiet beauty in someone else's life, if only we make sure those magic qualities of empathy and giving stay alive all year long.


~ The Girl In The Little Black Dress

The Comfort of Happiness

There is a Dean Karnazas quote that states, "Don't confuse comfort with happiness." While in many cases this may be true, I believe that comfort can be the first step to happiness.

Think of the families that are homeless, for no other reason than economic misfortune. Would a warm place to sleep out of the cold rain, and a meal to quell the feelings of hunger in their bellies not bring a small amount of happiness through the acquisition of those basic comforts? Think of the person who lost a loved one or is simply experiencing a difficult time in life. Would a hug from a friend saying "I'm here for you" not bring comfort that helps them heal and eventually feel happiness once again? A child who falls and sustains injury, a mother escaping with her children from an abusive relationship, an elderly resident of a nursing home who simply feels alone as they live out the final years of their life, small gestures of comfort from others bring happiness back, if only for a moment. Even abused and abandoned animals become loving, loyal pets once they're given basic comforts and shown kind actions.

My point is this, while comfort may not be a synonym for happiness, those who feel comforted can more easily find happiness and subsequently comfort others. In this world of constant upheavals and daily stress, if everyone took a single moment each day to utilize comfort as an action instead of a state of their own being, would life, our communities, and the world in general not be happier as a result? Pay it forward. It's the ultimate chain reaction that can change the world.

~ The Girl In The Little Black Dress

American Dream, or Nightmare?

Relationships. Webster defines a relationship as "the way in which two or more people or organizations regard and behave toward each other." That certainly leaves much to interpretation. Good or bad, positive or negative, caring or rude .... everyone we come in contact with is a form of "relationship" according to Webster! What about the relationships that mean the most to us? Our spouses or significant others, our family, our close friends ... how does that definition apply?

Theoretically we all strive to do right by those people in our lives we care about. It doesn't matter if it's a friend, family member, or coworker, I believe that if you see the good in someone else it brings out the good in yourself. We all have our "dark days". We all have our moments where we aren't at our best, but the Golden Rule of treating others as you would treat yourself absolutely applies. Essentially, if you truly care about someone, slips of attitude can always be forgiven in time. But what about the relationships that are without immediate human interaction? Dealings with landlords, banks, the decision makers in companies that one may never actually meet ... how do we keep those relationships positive when we have little to no interaction with anything but a slip of paper?

I recently watched a documentary entitled "American Winter". If you haven't seen it, you should. It pointed out the absolute obvious in our current economic climate. Over the past few years, the majority of us have gone through some form of economic hardship, but the major corporations have seen increased profits. Regardless of efforts by those people who are working multiple jobs and returning to school in an effort to better their opportunities, the companies who "hold the cards" like mortgage companies, landlords, and utilities providers, generally seem to refuse to give a benefit of the doubt and allow for a bit of altruism so that those people making an effort can get caught up from hardships and back on track. It would seem that they (the companies) are more interested in the short term rather than the benefits of what the long term will bring if only they treated clients with compassion and respect, instead of hard lining the immediate where money is concerned. It's no wonder the homeless rate has risen to ridiculous proportions and charitable organizations like food banks can no longer keep up with demand. While America is nowhere near the tragedies of the Great Depression, it would seem that FDR's New Deal enacted in the 1930's that got companies to raise the minimum wage while keeping costs of goods and services at the lowest possible rate should be seriously revisited if we are going to get the average American back on their feet without the need for federal or state assistance on a weekly and monthly basis. To quote from "American Winter", 'Right now, the American dream is to make it through tomorrow, and next week'. It's a sad state of affairs for a country that's supposed to be one of the richest in the world. To compound the issue, we seem to have reverted back to the days of Tammany Hall on a congressional level where there's more consideration for those who already hold wealth and power at the corporation level, than those who are desperately attempting to make ends meet at the family nucleus level. How many more lives will be destroyed before empathy is extended so that those who make the effort can get ahead without repercussions that only set them back again?

My hope for this new year is awareness that leads to empathy, that leads to action for the betterment of others. No one is entitled to a hand out without putting forth an honest effort, but those who put forth an honest effort should be allowed to not be knocked back down by the greed of others every time they do.

~ The Girl In The Little Black Dress

Societal Facets and Differing Viewpoints

I'm scrolling through the news of the day on Google, and after reading a number of articles two things occur to me ... 1. we are incredibly lucky to live in a society that allows and publishes voices of every opinion, and 2. there are alot of people, companies, and causes out there that allow politics and gossip to permeate their existence when they shouldn't.

Take the current situation of the Susan G. Komen foundation.  Here is this organization whose focus is supposed to be about ultimately eradicating breast cancer through research, prevention & treatment.  Unfortunately they appear to have allowed the voices of the right-wing pro-life AND the left-wing pro-choice to cause them to waive on their ultimate goal.  You can align yourself with either side of the pro-life/pro-choice equation, but everyone agrees that breast cancer is a disease that should be fought on every front.  Many organizations that do great things via providing needed prevention screening, treatment, and even research, have other areas of women's health that they also support that may be more controversial.  That does not mean that the Komen foundation should focus on anything but the area that they're providing the funding for ... the prevention of breast cancer for all women.  Politics was not the reason they began this organization, and it shouldn't now become a part of their decision making process for any reason as it causes the mission of their organization to become blurred.  Stay the course, people!

Example number two: the Obama Administration's fight to have all companies and organizations that offer health insurance to their employees cover contraception, regardless of their religious backing.  Before anyone gets up in arms over this one, let's look at the logical facts.  The First Amendment of the US Constitution states "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof."  Granted, there's quite a bit of room for interpretation in the wording, but ultimately it boils down to a simple point: government needs to not attempt to control religion, and religion needs to not attempt to control government.  Besides, the government controlled healthcare plan that is open to everyone will be covering contraception.  Why should a religious organization be forced to go against their beliefs by the government, if that same government will ultimately be handling the part that makes them so uncomfortable in the first place?  Seriously, live and let live, and stay out of each others' sh*t!

Another example ... the group One Million Moms getting fired up over J.C.Penny's continued backing of Ellen DeGeneres as their national spokeswoman.  To be honest, I don't really understand how an acclaimed comedian/actress/talk show host would be able to sway or change someone's family values by representing a store that sells clothing, cosmetics and household goods .......... seems a ridiculous waste of perfectly good energy that could be used towards actual issues like the treatement and prevention of juvenile diabetes, or bettering the level of education in this country, or combatting human trafficking.  This is a woman who brings laughter to millions, and supports countless charities and worthwhile causes with not only donations but by giving her voice and time as well, and, while there are some who have issues with same-sex relationships, it should be pointed out that she and her partner are married, committed and monogamous, and have been so for far longer than many heterosexual relationships last in this day and age.  Still don't see what any of this has to do with clothing ....

Back to the original point ... it's truly a wonderful thing to live in a society where, no matter what your opinion, you can be heard.  It should also be remembered that the variety of opinions and viewpoints are what makes all of this worthwhile.  The world would be an awfully boring, flat, uninteresting, unintelligent place if everyone thought, looked and acted exactly the same as everyone else.  There would be no original ideas, no creativity, no passion for anything as it would all be the same as everywhere else.  Just because someone else's voice is different than your own, or their politics are different than your own, doesn't mean that their voice and thoughts aren't valid points that should be respected for the added societal facets they bring to the table.

~ The Girl In The Little Black Dress